When darkness descends
look for the light that exists
Do you ever get times when you find you dwell far more on your brokenness than on God’s grace? When your mind can only linger on the negative?
When one more failure seems to send you spiralling as it suggests you’re useless, unworthy in and of yourself, with no fit place in this world?
Or when social media, coupled with adverse advertising, constantly reminds you how flawed, excluded, inadequate and incomplete you are.
I get times like this, though less often than before. But I’m still prone to bouts of depression and discouragement now and then.
It’s as if my life gets overturned, overshadowed by a menacing presence in the way a dense, suffocating cloud seeks to cover up the light that exists.
When it happens, I cower beneath that cloud, feeling as if I cannot breathe freely and the light has escaped me. The darkness can penetrate so much I seem to lose sight of where the light might be found.
Your triggers and experiences probably differ from mine, but whatever the cause might be, it’s often hard to move on from our brokenness or fight back against the heaviness of depression or discouragement.
We can forget how very broken we are before God and that He doesn’t demand perfection from us.
Yet we can rest in the fact that God’s grace covers all our sins, failures and mistakes, all our sadness, flaws, and pain. And because of the cross, Father God sees us as already perfected in Christ. An encouraging thought.
We can forget what powerful discouragement-fighting weapons we have in the practice of gratitude, prayer and praise.
Yet we can seek soul solace in Scripture’s rich promises or simply ask someone for help when we’re out of our depth and find it hard to pray for ourselves.
We can forget to turn toward the light which is ever-present even if it seems to be hiding sometimes.
Yet the slightest movement in the right direction, as we turn to God, can be all it takes to spot small glimmers of light in our darkest days.
“Lord, listen to all my tender cries. Read my every tear, like liquid words that plead for your help. I feel all alone at times, like a stranger to you, passing through this life just like all those before me.” — Psalm 39:12 TPT
I don’t like inhabiting the doldrums for long. Sinking into sadness is a horrible pit to be in. Snakes of self-reproach slither around our ankles and a berating, critical voice nags at our thoughts, piercing them with malice-laden darts.
So I am always grateful and relieved when small shafts of light finally reach me and God offers a loving arm to pull me out of a dark place, especially when it comes unexpectedly, arriving in ways I didn’t see.
I am always lifted, too, when creativity resurfaces, as I find a poem taking shape that expresses my feelings and somehow reveals the solution as well, while God whispers His Hope to my hurting soul.
He will do the same for you, too, my friend, in the way your own precious heart needs to receive it. And give you a beautiful reminder of how very cherished and beloved you truly are.
Made complete
there’s a hollow ache
rattling around inside
issuing from the place
where I often seek to hide
it’s calling out my name
telling me I’m not enough
filling me with shame
I’m unworthy to be loved
then I hear another voice
warm as honey in my soul
filled with hope and grace
promising I can be whole
my deep brokenness
is no deterrent here
it’s a vehicle via which
my Saviour will appear
he knows all about my pain
whispers solace to my heart
makes me complete again
frees me from sin and dark
all I considered lost
broken beyond repair
is redeemed at the Cross
a gift beyond compare
© joylenton
I’m grateful God doesn’t wait for us to clean up our act before coming to Him. Mercy and grace are continually being extended to us. We simply need to reach out and accept them.
May we never forget that God always has a place in His heart for the prodigals, the broken, and the lost.
Merciful Saviour,
Oh how we expect so much from ourselves as creatures of dust. How easily we slide into self-pity, sadness and sorrow, dive deep into discouragement, depression or despair or get stuck in a rut of grief while our feelings get the better of us.
Yet you do not stand at a distance, viewing us with critical eyes. You are not remote or judgemental at all. As we reveal the worst of ourselves, exhibit our raw, aching humanity, our inadequacy and brokenness, you draw closer still.
You hold us fast in a Holy hug. You whisper Hope into our hurting hearts. You freely offer us your Love. You gently lift us out of whatever pit we may have fallen into. You dust us down and set us back on our feet again. You remind us who we are— the redeemed people of the Cross, dear to your sacred heart.
Your Light invades our souls, burning brighter than anything. Your mercy makes us whole even as we remain fragile, weary and weak. You rescue us. And you never stop. We kneel before you now with humble and grateful hearts.
Amen
“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases,
his mercies never come to an end:
they are new every morning;
great is thy faithfulness.”
— Lamentations 3:22-23 RSV
NOTE: This is an amended, extended version of a post previously shared on my Poetry Joy blog. It doesn’t offer any medical advice, it simply describes my personal experience and directs you towards the spiritual support God provides for us. If your low mood worsens and persists, do seek professional guidance and help.
You might be interested in reading my first book, a semi-memoir poetry collection called ‘Seeking Solace’ which explores themes of love, life, loss and faith, and how we can discover God’s grace in the hard and broken places. You can access the UK version here.
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What a generous offering, Joy. The line about the slightest movement toward God being enough to spot small glimmers... that feels like such mercy. So much of what gets written about discouragement asks too much of those already weary. Yours doesn't. It simply holds out a hand. Thank you dear friend.
Thérèse
i wonder if sometimes those of us who struggle with health/sensitivity/disability issues don't find it difficult to see those very things as blessings that lead us into living a slower and simpler life. we can feel guilty about our 'imperfection' and as if we aren't trying hard enough when we see others accomplishing so much. but perhaps, we are the ones who, in many ways, can live life at a slower pace, giving thanks for the graces and benefits and the holy embrace of prayer. what do you think? my quiet life truly seems like a blessing despite the chronic pain and fatigue. it can give us an appreciation for so much that others take for granted.